1-900-HOTDOG
February 2026 Illustrated Podcast Roundup
January 2026
I illustrated February’s podcast roundup with vampire portraits and crayon Valentines.
Approach: Sexy vampires for DOGG ZZONE 9000 and Valentine cards for BIGFEETS.
Publication credit: Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
DOGG ZZONE 9000 — Episode 263: Automan Goes to Zippers with Zak Koonce
Zak Koonce joins us for a follow up to last week’s episode about Automan, the computerized himbo who can do anything. This time, cyber hunk hijinks and pixie boy jealousy collide as Automan becomes a male stripper. Take it off, Automan. Show us your .pkg.
File → Properties
- Creator
- Thomas Hawkins
- Credit
- Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
- Provenance
- Approved February 2026 roundup illustration; its publication, source image, and postcard destination are recorded here.
- Source image
- Open source image
DOGG ZZONE 9000 — Episode 264: The Rock ’N Roll Sports Classic with Lydia Bugg
Seanbaby, Brockway, and Lydia Bugg watch shockingly famous rock stars run badly and drown quickly. It’s 1978’s Rock ‘N Roll Sports Classic, featuring The Jacksons, Earth, Wind and Fire, Boston, Gladys Knight, The Runaways, Kenny Loggins, and more. Dan McQuade would have loved this. It’s only missing Jeff Altman. RIP buddy.
File → Properties
- Creator
- Thomas Hawkins
- Credit
- Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
- Provenance
- Approved February 2026 roundup illustration; its publication, source image, and postcard destination are recorded here.
- Source image
- Open source image
DOGG ZZONE 9000 — Episode 265: Mister T with Merritt K
Today Brockway, Seanbaby, and Merritt K are going to save America. By tapping the golden wisdom of Mister T.
File → Properties
- Creator
- Thomas Hawkins
- Credit
- Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
- Provenance
- Approved February 2026 roundup illustration; its publication, source image, and postcard destination are recorded here.
- Source image
- Open source image
DOGG ZZONE 9000 — Episode 266: Sampson and Sally with Meagan Brockway
Brockway and Seanbaby ask Brockway’s wife, Meagan, for her cursed media origin story. She answers with Samson & Sally: a Danish animated film about cute lil’ whale children on a search for the legendary Moby Dick. Along the way they’ll find their families’ corpses, the dancing dead of every war, insane irradiated walruses, and yes! Eventually they do find Moby Dick (dying from dementia).
File → Properties
- Creator
- Thomas Hawkins
- Credit
- Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
- Provenance
- Approved February 2026 roundup illustration; its publication, source image, and postcard destination are recorded here.
- Source image
- Open source image
BIGFEETS — Episode 64: The Twisted Torch
Jeff finally says something that’s worth listening to on this very special episode of BIGFEETS!
File → Properties
- Creator
- Thomas Hawkins
- Credit
- Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
- Provenance
- Approved February 2026 roundup illustration; its publication, source image, and postcard destination are recorded here.
- Source image
- Open source image
BIGFEETS — Episode 65: The Wolves of West Virginia
After an exciting cliffhanger and an agonizing year-long break between seasons, Mountain Monsters fans finally get the answers they’re looking for. “Fuck you” is a kind of answer.
File → Properties
- Creator
- Thomas Hawkins
- Credit
- Thomas Hawkins for 1-900-HOTDOG
- Provenance
- Approved February 2026 roundup illustration; its publication, source image, and postcard destination are recorded here.
- Source image
- Open source image
Executive function: Being used by another application/work/february-2026-illustrated-podcast-roundup/
Choose an image.
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Thom’s Stuff
Thomas Hawkins
Thom draws the illustrated podcast roundups for 1-900-HOTDOG and makes other things when the table permits.
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Kat’s Corner
KATONKRITA.EXE
Kat draws things she likes.
- Status
- Current Kankri concentration: CRITICAL
- Upload schedule
- Conceptually present
Selected Things
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STATUS: NOT PUBLIC
Junior Lab
The junior operators make things too.
Their work goes online when they decide it does.
Current laboratory condition:
Glitter containment failure
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Convenience, allegedly
KZ MART
Scan the extremely ordinary shopping before the clock gives up.
15seconds0scanned
Register closed. Snack subsystem online.
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You clicked it.
This is now paperwork.
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Run
Run
Type the name of a KatZat program.
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Run
That command is not available.
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Run command help
zat- Launch ZAT.EXE.
kat- Open Kat’s application.
hotdog- Open the 1-900-HOTDOG Dialer.
kz- Open System Properties.
recycle- Open the Recycle Bin.
screensaver- Start KZBOUNCE.SCR.
help- Open this document.
kankri- Open Kat’s Preliminary Clarification Wizard.
homestuck- Estimate the explanation time.
hack the planet- Open PLANET.EXE.
taskmgr- Open Task Manager.
kzmart- Open KZ MART.
alchemy- Open ALCHEMY.EXE.
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Zat Properties
Zat Properties
- Name:
- Zat
- Status:
- Idle
- Mood:
- Content
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1-900-HOTDOG Dialer
Ready
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Sketch Graveyard
Recycle Bin
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README.TXT
Nothing in here bites. Usually.
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About This Extremely Normal Computer
KatZat Studios Family Computer
KatZat Home Edition
- Version:
- 3.0.2
- Status:
- Nothing is technically on fire
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Preliminary Clarification Wizard
Before Kat explains this, several preliminary distinctions must be acknowledged.
Step 1 of 413
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Estimated explanation time: 6 days, 12 hours.
Continue?
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KANKRI.TXT
PRELIMINARY CLARIFICATION NOTES
Before beginning, it is important to distinguish the introduction from the preparation for the introduction. They are different folders.
This document is still gathering the necessary context required to explain why it requires so much context.
Please acknowledge that your previous acknowledgement has been acknowledged.
You are now adequately prepared to begin preparing.
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Planet status: unhacked
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Network Identity
Current identity: GUEST
Probably you.
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Task Manager
Processes: Too many. Cooperation: Limited.
- hyperfocus.exe
- dinner.exe
- forty_seven_tabs.exe
- where_are_my_keys.dll
- zat.exe
- sid_6.7.exe
Select a process to end.
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ALCHEMY.EXE
Put two files in the circle and begin the exchange.
Exchange pending.
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